[englishtext]This is the prologue of my new novel, which I am still writing. Note: I did not edit it yet, so it might includes many of mistakes. I would like to have criticism and viewpoints[/englishtext]
[englishtext]Prologue
The sky has promised rain, the whole ambience was in terror and slowly the wind has begun to blow on them. Admirah, the little girl who went with her mother to attend the court. Many people were there when the mother and daughter arrived to the archway of the court building. Admirah did not know what was going on, or why she and her mother were outdoors at this horrible and storming weather. Mishuggah was sad, despair overcame her since she lost her husband, the one who had fought against the colonial troops in the province where his family, relatives and friends live. Admirah looked at her mother, she found her tranquil and motionless when the officer was surveying her ID card. Nothing Admirah felt at that moment, but only depression, not hers, but the crowed people's one. Nothing drew her attention, because she was thinking of her friend. Fadi was Admirah's friend, together they discover life, and find out what childhood must be at their age; both of them were in the same age round and Fadi was older by not more than one year. But now there was no one to share her feelings with, Admirah tried to concern on the occasion of attending the court, her mother did not tell her, but she only said, "Admi, when we will be there, you will know why we are there." Admirah never asked additional question but she kept silence.
They sat in the third row of the court's benches. Beside Mishuggah where a scarved- woman whose feel was also sullen like hers. The crowd stood up when the three black-dressed magistrates, and two law-military officers got in, and took their places, the entry of these officers was followed by the entry of the prisoners. Actually they were eleven, dressed in yellow gown. At that moment and as her mother said, Admirah knew why she was here. Spontaneously Admirah uttered in audible voice which every one could her, even her father, "Papa." Her mother started to cry, but invisible tears. Abraham, turned his face to see his wife and daughter, sat between the crowd. But he said nothing and he only waved goodbye. This goodbye was the last one Admirah and her mother could see.
"According to the law of France, the judges _ my friends _ and the military officers' verdict will be that all the group in the cage shall face the sentence of death by firing." Said the judger who occupied the middle chair. This verdict was followed by the outcry of the near-to-be-widow wives. Admirah did not know what was all this mess, but when she saw her mother drowned within her never-ending tear, she knew that the family will be one member less. This decree was followed by calling every prisoner to say his name and then to leave the court, Rasheed, Ramez, Ahmad, Mouhammad, Johnny, Michael, Abraham, Samuel, Abdullah, Ismael, Tony, and Jacob. These names exemplified the Syrian warriors who fight against the French Colonial Army in Syria during the colonial period, and all of them will leave the country not banished but sentenced to death by shooting in the back yard of the military prison. When Abraham left, Admirah never asked her mother where my father has gone, she understood what the translator said in Arabic, she know her father will be fired to death. Her blood cried for this and nothing more, outside the building which contained the whole crowed, prisoners or warriors, their families and their wives, and officers a downpour inundated the city, while Admirah could not distinguish between the raindrops and her mother and other catastrophic families' tears.[/englishtext]
how many novel have you read through the span of your life? u have to prove a record between 100-200 novel at least in order to be able to write some short paragraph, but as a start it is good
آخر تعديل بواسطة A.Habbal في الأحد آب 19, 2007 1:04 م، عدل 1 مرة
I appreciate your "GIFT" BUT AT THE SAME TIME if u do not have any kind of writing style your lines will be nothing but a mere rubbish , do not even think to take the last word as its respective meaning but this is to say that u got the ability , it is ok for today but u r not going to challenge and make a fame from such things, it is a matter of style and system not a matter of expressing everyone's ability to write with no regard to those minds who really care about content and the way of writing
keep it on and let's see what you got , I hope I can pass some quids to buy your "GIFT" someday.
لا تستطيع كتابة مواضيع جديدة في هذا المنتدى لا تستطيع كتابة ردود في هذا المنتدى لا تستطيع تعديل مشاركاتك في هذا المنتدى لا تستطيع حذف مشاركاتك في هذا المنتدى لا تستطيع إرفاق ملف في هذا المنتدى
يمكنك أن تستفيد من الصلاحيات الإضافية للعضو و المشاركة في المنتدى بالتسجيل من هنا , كما يشرفنا أن ينضم إلينا الأساتذة و المعلمون 
تسجيل الدخول
تصفح جوال
الأسئلة المتكررة
بحث
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