Four-line Poems

Odysseus · **Posted:** Fri Dec 25, 2009 4:17 pm

عبير,

Quote:

Well, here are my first four lines

Emptiness

Like a hero with no power
Like a scentless flower
Like a bird that cannot fly
Like a night with no moon in the sky

This is the First time I know that you have the roots of a poet :mrgreen:

I can add a line to yours; "Like Art-en without topics" :mrgreen:

Quote:

I'll do my best to participate whenever the muse comes

Can you specify which Muse you mean please ?? :mrgreen:

Because as you know, there are nine "muses" - daughters of Zeus -
1- Calliope : Epic Poetry
2- Clio: History
3- Erato: Love Poetry
4- Euterpe: lyric poetry
5- Melpomene: tragedy
6- Polyhymnia: songs of praise to the "gods"
7- Terpsichore: dancing
8- Thalia: comedy
9- Urania: astronomy

I think you need none of them :wink:

Nawal8q,

Quote:

Sweet Lies

It did came not fro thy heart.
For thee art known with deceive.
That word to my soul reacheth not.
Afraid are my ears to believe

Nawal, I think you should replace "thee" in the second line with "thou".

The fourth line does not make sense to me!! So what do you mean? I couldn't understand it. I think you can rewrite it in other form so that it can be easier to understanding!!

Quote:

My Last Wish

For once in a lifetime,
Show me that you care.
That your arms are opened,
And you're really there.
Give me some of your interest,
Some of everything to share.

This consists of more than four lines :mrgreen:

but nice

The other four-line poems are well-composed. I loved the following very much:

Quote:

No Longer a Child

Madness had dissolved
The child inside got old
What left of that story died
Outside. Inside, a shining gold

Ezra Pound can't write like it :mrgreen:

You reminded me of this poet; because Ezra wrote such short poems, and even shorter; such as "In a Station of the Metro":

The Apparition of these faces in the crowd;
Petals on a wet, black bough.

This is a two-line poem :wink:

In my view, the best one of these poems is:

Quote:

Dead inside

Delighted love is all you seek
And pure love is all I offer.
Though strong with you, inside I'm meek
I die each night of pain and suffer.

Those who say you're not a real poet are lying. God Bless You !! You said you're "weak" in the third line and then immediately explained how in the next line. So the poem is coherent, and this is the most important issue here.

زمردة · **Posted:** Sat Dec 26, 2009 3:06 am

Ala Al-Ibrahim,

Quote:

This is the First time I know that you have the roots of a poet

Those roots are still very little *sla

Quote:

I can add a line to yours; "Like Art-en without topics"

Yes, but where is the rhyme? *hh

Actually, the tittle implies the meaning of both longing and loneliness. There is nothing to do with "Emptiness" as being empty :wink:

Quote:

Can you specify which Muse you mean please ??
Because as you know, there are nine "muses" - daughters of Zeus -
1- Calliope : Epic Poetry
2- Clio: History
3- Erato: Love Poetry
4- Euterpe: lyric poetry
5- Melpomene: tragedy
6- Polyhymnia: songs of praise to the "gods"
7- Terpsichore: dancing
8- Thalia: comedy
9- Urania: astronomy

It is the first time I know that there are nine muses. :shock:

My Muse is vey special it is called Abeer's muse :mrgreen:

I'm curious to know more about this subject.

Thank you very much indeed brother

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Sun Dec 27, 2009 2:59 pm

عبير,
You are most welcome honey.... *ورود

Ala Al-Ibrahim,

Quote:

It did came not fro thy heart.
For thee art known with deceive.
That word to my soul reacheth not.
Afraid are my ears to believe

Quote:

Nawal, I think you should replace "thee" in the second line with "thou".

Right, I will change it.

Quote:

The fourth line does not make sense to me!! So what do you mean? I couldn't understand it. I think you can rewrite it in other form so that it can be easier to understanding!!

It means that the speaker wishes that he could believe what the addressee -as you name it :mrgreen:

- is telling him. The sentence becomes to be, My ears are afraid to beielve what you are telling me.
Hope you get it. :wink:

Quote:

This consists of more than four lines but nice

The idea is not about the number, but about the poem itself.

Quote:

Ezra Pound can't write like it You reminded me of this poet

Quote:

In my view, the best one of these poems is:

اقتباس:
Dead inside

Delighted love is all you seek
And pure love is all I offer.
Though strong with you, inside I'm meek
I die each night of pain and suffer.

Good choice :wink:

Quote:

Those who say you're not a real poet are lying

Thank you , I don't deserve all that.... :oops:

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Wed Dec 30, 2009 3:28 am

you taught me to hold my pen,
And now you ask to be freed.
As a cage with bird inside,
Who dreams to be released.

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Sat Jan 02, 2010 3:52 pm

حلواني,

Quote:

شكراً لك نوال في الحقيقة انا لست من هواة كتابة القصائد أو الشعر في اللغة الانكليزية .. ولكن الواضح بشكل جلي انك مبدعة في الشعر ..

Thank you so much,

You are wo=elcome to tell us your opinion about what we write.

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Sat Jan 09, 2010 2:04 am

The heart that loved,
Can hate.
What was once filled with love,
Is now filled with hatred.

قاسم عيسى · **Posted:** Sun Jan 10, 2010 1:41 am

Here is my first poem:
Lay down your swords, blood and flesh you share
Seed of Abraham, sons of Ismael
Shall we see the end of war, blood brothers?
Or shall we fill another grave, for ourselves we couldn't save

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Thu Aug 18, 2011 8:13 pm

Leave me for my wounds,
Leave me for my tears.
You can't mend these scars,
You can't fight my fears.
I only can be killed once.

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Thu Aug 18, 2011 8:15 pm

Sick of waiting,
Sick of being behind.
Tired of tiresome mind,
Of every minute in such land.

Nawal8q · **Posted:** Thu Aug 18, 2011 8:18 pm

No way seems out
None in, or back behind.
Whenever hope calls out,
Worries drive opposite tide.

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Four-line Poems